


Shadows

by carolinecrane



Series: Retrograde [16]
Category: CSI: Miami
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-02-26
Updated: 2004-02-26
Packaged: 2018-05-28 01:51:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6309619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolinecrane/pseuds/carolinecrane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last thing he needs right now is more complications.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shadows

Speed's passed by the A/V lab at least three times so far this morning, and he can't even pretend anymore that he's not doing it on purpose. He's inventing reasons to walk past, just to catch a glimpse of Tyler's profile as he works on whatever he's been so engrossed in all morning, and it's starting to make him feel a little guilty.

He feels a little stupid, too, but Tyler hasn't spotted him, so mostly Speed ignores the fact that what he's doing is ridiculous and focuses on the part where he hasn't really told Tyler anything yet. And it's weird, because he's told him the hardest part, said the words out loud and now Tyler knows what he lost. Only he doesn't, not really, and that's the reason Speed can't stop thinking about it.

He doesn't feel guilty about calling David a friend, because they were friends. Best friends, but so much more than that, and there's no way Tyler's not wondering what Speed's not telling him. Like the fact that David was his first...everything: first friend, first kiss, first love, first heartbreak. He got Speed stoned for the first time, their first kiss laced with the sweet taste of pot and it still seems like a dream to Speed when he thinks about it now.

That was a long time ago, though, and he knows he has to tell Tyler the rest. Maybe he should have told him last night, before he let them get as far as Tyler's bedroom. There was plenty of time after too, in between kisses and more sex, as slow as it was intense and he has to swallow a shudder when he remembers it. There was this morning too, in the shower before work, but by then they were running late and Speed told himself he didn't have time for a long explanation about David and his parents and everything that led him to Miami.

So he's still looking for the right time, and every time he finds himself walking down the hall outside of the A/V lab it gets a little harder not to stop and go inside and tell Tyler everything. Only this is the wrong place and definitely the wrong time, because even though he doesn't have to worry about getting distracted by sex there are other worries, other distractions, like Calleigh and Eric and a dozen other people who could see them together and know that they couldn't be talking about a case.

There aren't any cases to talk about, and that's part of the problem, because if Speed was out in the field he wouldn't have time to be so distracted by this. If he had evidence to process and clues to follow he'd be focused, he wouldn't be thinking about Tyler's mouth or the curve of his spine or the way he sounds when he says 'Tim' in that voice that makes Speed feel like they're the only two people in the world. He's not sure when he got addicted to that, but it's definitely an addiction, because it's making him do stupid things like agree to go to parties and talk about things that are better left in the past.

Things he doesn't even think about much anymore, but then his brother showed up out of nowhere and reminded him that nothing stays in the past forever. So it's better if he just gets it out there, gets it over with so he can go back to not thinking about it. He's almost convinced himself to get it over with right now, even though they're both on the clock and he's supposed to be finishing a backlog of paperwork, but before he gives in and pushes open the door to the A/V lab his cell phone rings.

He rolls his eyes and fishes the phone out of his pocket, frowning down at the unfamiliar number on the screen before he answers. "Speedle."

"Tim."

It takes him a second to recognize the voice, but when he does he glances unconsciously over his shoulder. Tyler hasn't looked up once in all the times Speed's walked past his lab, so of course when Speed looks through the glass this time Tyler's watching him. He nods almost imperceptibly and turns his attention back to the familiar voice on the other end of the line. "Bernstein. What's up?"

There's a pause on the other end of the line, and Speed's mind races as he tries to figure out what Bernstein could want from him now. They haven't spoken since that day in Speed's car, and as far as he knows Bernstein's still working Narcotics. "Listen, Tim, do you have a brother?"

"Yeah," Speed answers automatically, his heart racing now as he connects the dots between his brother and a detective on the Narcotics squad. "Why?"

"There was a rave last night, one of our guys got a tip about a small-time dealer who was planning to do some business there. The place was crawling with kids from out of town, they rounded up a bunch of them and called everybody's parents. Your brother wouldn't give up any information, but he's been asking for you."

"So he's been arrested."

"Yeah, they booked him about an hour ago."

He can't believe this is happening; he's never heard of Matt getting into any kind of trouble. Then again, he doesn't really know anything about his brother, so he has no idea if this is normal for Matt. Part of him wants to let him sit in jail for awhile just to teach him a lesson, but if he does that Matt will let the cops call his parents and then Speed will have to go get him anyway. He lets out a frustrated sigh and runs a hand through his hair, already wondering how he's going to explain this to his mother. "I'll take care of it. Listen, Bernstein...thanks."

"Don't mention it," Bernstein says, and Speed's about to hang up when he starts talking again. "I didn't know you had a brother."

He hears the accusation in Bernstein's voice, but he ignores it. "Yeah, we're not close. Thanks again. I'll see you around."

He hangs up before Bernstein has a chance to answer, dropping the phone back in his pocket and turning toward Horatio's office. The last thing he wants to do is explain to his boss why he has to leave in the middle of a shift, but he doesn't really have a choice. And he's going to kill Matt when he sees him, because the last thing he needs right now is more complications.

Before he makes it halfway down the hall Horatio rounds the corner, and he stops in his tracks when he sees Horatio's expression.

"Speed," Horatio says, peacock blue jacket flying out behind him as he strides down the hall, "a park ranger just found several bodies in Biscayne. You're with Eric…I need you to secure the scene and work up the body before we turn it over to Alexx."

"Sure thing, H," Speed says, on automatic pilot because his job comes first and he's never let his personal life get in the way of that. Not that he's ever had much of a personal life to get in the way, so he's not sure if a brother in jail counts as a personal emergency. He has a feeling it does, and he knows if he says 'I need to take care of this' that Horatio will understand. Only Horatio's already walking away, calling something over his shoulder about meeting them down there.

And he's not really sure what just happened, but any second now Eric's going to come looking for him and he has a feeling it'll be a long time before he makes it to the station to deal with his brother. He lets out a frustrated sigh and looks up, startled to find Tyler standing in the hallway, and this day just keeps getting better.

"Everything okay?" Tyler asks, and from his expression Speed can tell he's been watching for awhile.

"We got a call," Speed answers, walking back toward Tyler and glancing around to make sure Horatio's not still lurking somewhere. "I need to go down to Biscayne."

"Big case?" And he must look surprised at the question, because Tyler shrugs and grins self-consciously. "It's just that you look a little rattled."

"My brother got arrested." He's not sure what makes him blurt it out like that; he wasn't planning on telling Tyler at all, but he's surprised to find that saying it out loud makes him feel a little better.

"What'd he do?"

"I don't know yet. I was about to go post bail when H found me…I don't know when I'll be able to get over there now."

As soon as he says it he knows what's coming, and maybe that's why he told Tyler the truth instead of making up some vague lie about being tired or hating having to trek through gator country. And he doesn't know what it says about him – about them – that he's about to agree to what he knows Tyler's going to offer, but he doesn't have time to think about it now.

"I'll go."

"Are you sure?" he asks, because it's only fair to give Tyler a chance to back out. "You don't have to…"

"Tim, he's your brother." As though that's the only reason Tyler needs to do something this big for him. As though he doesn't need a reason at all, and Speed has a feeling this is one of those relationship things he's never been any good at. "I'll take him back to my place until you're done."

He frowns at that thought, because Matt showing up at his place is one thing, but Matt in Tyler's apartment – it's too much like the past colliding with the…well, the present, anyway. But there's not much else he can do except hand over his keys, and he can't ask Tyler to hang out at his place and babysit his brother for however long he's stuck at work. "You probably don't want to leave him alone with anything valuable."

Tyler laughs at that, but Speed hopes he takes the warning at least a little seriously, because he has no idea what his brother's capable of. He doesn't know whether he had drugs on him or if he was using or even if this is his first time, and he can't help worrying about leaving Matt alone with someone he cares about. That thought takes him by surprise, but he doesn't dwell on it too long. Instead he takes a step backwards, putting a little distance between them so he won't do anything stupid like lean in and kiss Tyler goodbye.

"Tyler…"

"I'll see you later," Tyler interrupts, already reaching for his keys, and Tim knows there's no way 'thank you' is ever going to be enough.

He says it anyway, gets a smile for his effort and just for a second the whole messy situation doesn't seem so bad. Then he hears someone calling his name and turns away from the sight of Tyler's retreating back, catching a glimpse of Delko's clenched jaw and he knows it's going to be a really long day.


End file.
